Satire: Where in the world is Cecilia Mazzocco?

Noah Aberegg

Senior Cecilia Mazzocco is excited for her role on cast of Newsies.

Noah Aberegg, Staff Reporter

After her star role as Rosie in last year’s production of Bye Bye Birdie, everyone has wondered where star musician Cecilia Mazzocco has gone? For months, she has disappeared from school and the music world, causing massive speculation. In a recent post on her Instagram page, Cecilia broke the silence and shocked the community. 

In her post, she announced that she had recently been recruited to star in the Women’s History Month special, all-female cast of Newsies as Jack. She discussed how earlier this year, Broadway had reached out to her due to her success in theatre and powerful feminist movement to star in their show. When it came to auditions, she was confident in getting her dream role.

“I knew my theatre skills were awful. There was no way they would have picked me on talent alone. But when I realized it was for Women’s History Month, I knew my Women’s History Month pins would carry me across the finish line. I brought several to the auditions, passing them out to the judges and wearing them on my audition outfit,” Cecilia said. 

Cecilia also apologized to her teachers, classmates, and Mary Poppins cast for never being present, as she’s had to travel to NYC for rehearsals. She also apologized for lying to everyone, telling them she has been attending college auditions, when actually, she has just been at rehearsal.

For months before her announcement, she’s told classmates and teachers about college auditions weekend after weekend. However, upon her return from each one, she always seemed to fall short of acceptance. 

“When Cecilia was our drum major, she was brilliant. I honestly thought I saw the next Leonard Bernstein, America’s most famous conductor,” Band Director Mr. Caleb Rebarchek said. “I’m absolutely stunned she hasn’t gotten into a college yet.” 

However, after placing second to last at PMEA Regional Choir, even some of her closest friends were wondering about her downfall.

“To be honest, I never even looked at my music before the festival, but I placed much higher than Cecilia,” Caden Guizar said.

Her boyfriend, Noah Gadsby, also voiced his concerns on the matter.

“I was beginning to worry about her,” Noah said. “She’s been so distant lately. Whenever we’re together, she’s constantly hiding her phone from me and running out of the room on ‘important calls.’ I was wondering what she was hiding.”

On the other hand, her best friend, Cecilia Stanton, was a little disappointed in the outcome.

“I thought she was just being a good person and letting me be the best Cecilia for a few months,” Cecilia said. “To be honest, I’m a little disappointed now.”

Despite all of the negative speculation, Cecilia is still grateful for the opportunity she was given to perform.

“Jack is my dream role, and I am so excited to be able to perform this during Women’s History Month. Thank you everyone for supporting me during this life-changing event,” Cecilia said.