It’s the holiday season, and gift giving is in full swing! Everyone has at least one person for whom they don’t know what to get. Either they already have everything, they never “need” anything, or they’re picky. Well don’t worry, because here are a few undeniably, yet super-satirical perfect presents!

For that aunt or uncle who feels more like your sibling, buy out all stores of toothbrushes, and then gift them for Christmas. This will make them appreciate the use of their toothbrush, which will give them more love for what they have, and what more could they ask for than love. But, don’t forget to throw away their old one or else all your hardwork will go to waste.

For your long-term partner whom you’ve already bought everything for over the past years, wrap yourself as a present, because you are the best thing they could ever ask for. You will need a large box, one you can fit inside of, a bow to match it, and a holiday wrapping paper. Then with the help of a friend, wrap yourself inside of the box, finishing it off with a large bow. It’s a fool-proof plan.

Now for the grandparents who gave you everything your parents refused. Get them a magazine of nursing home inspiration. This will help lift the pressure of their upcoming move to their forever home, by showing all of the possible options. If you’re feeling the gift needs something else, just add a subscription to an online store like Temu, that helps feed their clearance shopping addiction, that most grandparents seem to have.

Finally, to your parents, the ones who brought you into this world, you need something special. Grab your finest sheet of printer paper, driest sharpies, and dullest scissors. Create your parents tickets for a set of chores they always need from you, such as two shopping sprees at your favorite store, four late curfew nights, three speeding tickets, and five empty milk cartons left in the fridge. All of these are sure to make it a very merry Christmas.

“I love getting gifts, but I’m especially excited to see if my 16-month old chooses to make me the ‘chore tickets’ for this holiday season. I’m so sick of cleaning the house,” English teacher Mrs. Jessica Lloyd, a mother of one and gift enthusiast said.

We hope all of these unique ideas relieved you of some of the pesty gift giving pressure. We all want nothing but the best for our families, and these are sure to show it!